Netflix fans “emotionally triggered” by Ashley Madison documentary

Ashley Madison: Sex, Lies & Scandal has arrived on Netflix, leaving some viewers feeling “emotionally triggered” by the documentary. 

The new true crime docu-series delves into the infamous dating app for married people looking to have an affair, as well as the 2015 hacking incident that saw millions of users’ personal information leaked on the dark web for all to see. 

The fallout was massive. As reported at the time, there were at least two suicides linked to the Ashley Madison hack. 

Those in the public sphere were called out online. This was certainly the case for YouTubers Sam and Nia Rader, who appear in the Netflix doc to share their experiences with the leak and Sam’s cheating.

For many viewers, it’s been a difficult watch. Taking to Reddit, one wrote, “I didn’t expect to be emotionally triggered by this documentary. 

“I felt disgusted not by the cheating but by how cowardly these cheaters were. For the most part, they were afraid to talk to their spouse about their sexual needs, or that they were unhappy with the relationship.”

Another wrote, “Them calling cheating ‘a mistake’ and ‘it takes two to tango’ made me furious. Like, is it really a docu in 2024? Are we still living in the 90s? They pushed the narrative ‘it’s okay to cheat, and you have to forgive’. Bullsh*t.”

Over on X/Twitter, there are just as many posts from viewers discussing the emotions the docu-series has brought up in them. 

“Ugh. I made poor choices for stuff to watch this morning… Watching the Ashley Madison documentary series on Netflix,” said one. “Been cheated on in every relationship I had. The feelings are feeling a bit [heartbroken].”

A second commented, “Watching the new Ashley Madison documentary on Netflix and it’s already pissing me off 29 minutes in. ‘liFe iS sHoRt HaVe aN aFfaIR’ shut the f**k up lmao.”

A Reddit user who claims their now ex-husband was on the data leak list has shared a lengthier post describing what it is in Ashley Madison: Sex, Lies & Scandal that has triggered them. 

“I’m going to preface this by saying that my now ex-husband was not only a violent, abusive narcissist but also a serial cheater so when Ashley Madison was hacked I immediately searched the data and was not surprised to find him listed,” they wrote. 

“So, I understand that people are going to cheat regardless but Jesus Christ that doesn’t mean you have to HELP THEM DO IT… 

“Here’s why I’m making this post though — some of these people being interviewed are actively gaslighting us as the audience. Saying ‘Ashley Madison taught me that the cheater is not the only one to blame.’ Yes, they are. 

“I have no issue with open/poly relationships that are built on communication, honesty, and consent — that’s not cheating… but when your partner who has sworn to be faithful to you lies to you, goes behind your back, and has an affair (emotional or physical) with another person that is your cheating partner’s fault and ONLY their fault. 

“Saying otherwise is so damaging for people who have been hurt in this way, especially if we’ve also been victims of narcissistic abuse.”

There were just as many angry comments about Sam and Nia’s story, notably that he cheated on her relentlessly at strip clubs, massage parlors, and even with Nia’s friends. He lied about it before fessing up — but she still forgave him, with the pair citing their Christian beliefs as one of the ways they moved past it. 

The Redditor said in an update on their post, “Way too much focus on the money-hungry ‘Christian’ vlogger couple who are doing so much damage by advertising that you have to forgive a cheating spouse because that’s what god wants.”

Another agreed, “Cheating is one thing, but his choice of affair partners is sociopathic and is cause for major concern. He could’ve cheated with ANYONE but he chose to do it with people that are the most damaging to her? Come on now.”

Not everyone agrees, however, with one writing on the couple’s latest YouTube video, “It must have taken a lot of work, and I’m really glad you got through it.”

Ashley Madison: Sex, Lies & Scandal is streaming on Netflix now. For more true crime, check out details on the new Cesar Roman doc, how to watch the Alison Botha doc, or dive into the Fiona Muir articles related to Baby Reindeer. You can also find new TV shows to add to your watchlist in May.